Ladies and Gentlemen this is your captain, my name is ......
Firstly let me welcome you to our flight today. I am sorry if any of you are upset by the sight of the crew all holding mugs of Costa coffee, sadly it is needed for us to get through the day.
Please show a little consideration if you happen to come across a sleeping member of the crew during our flight today, they were probably working on the other side of the clock to what they were doing yesterday, but you will be glad to know that it's all legal and approved by our senior managers.
If you hear or feel a vibration during the flight, do not be concerned, it is probably someone taking some controlled rest and snoring. Though please to highlight this in your comments online as we will get said crew member into our sleep lab to provide data for our endurance program.
With that I would like to wish you a relaxing flight.
Keep recovering all.