I just do it, it seems to work, wouldn't have a clue how to describe what I do.
I remember having exactly the same feeling when I first started to instruct in gliders. "How do I land? Well, I just land it!" As others have pointed out, it is like driving - you don't consciously think about manipulating the controls while driving.
It took me a while to develop a decent instructional technique. Incidentally, I often feel that I learn more than my students when instructing.
Concerning the power-off, power-on debate, when I learned to fly (back in the dark ages in the UK - my whole PPL course was non-radio!), I was taught to close the throttle on base leg, when I thought I could make it and then fly a glide approach. I still do that on occasion, for practice, if I'm at a quiet airport.
Mary's flight with the journalist in a motorglider, reminds me of a similar experience. I once took an ag-pilot for a ride. I briefed him about shutting down when at height and he said "I'm going to find that very difficult. In my business, if the engine stops, you are probably going to die."