Interesting and personal read.
I am sure you have your own plans but my immediate thought would be that if you don't have some other work immediately lined up, try to get into dispatching or something like that or working in operations for a charter company etc. Maybe you are done with the industry completely and fair enough if you are, but that might be one way to earn some money while you work out what you want to do for the rest of your life, which yields a very small chance of letting your dream progress.