Arfur Dent
Loved that first line of yours and bang on too.
They do don't they.
Like the IQ challenged kid pushed out the front door by his mum, stumbling around and crashing into sh!t, one unbalanced step after another....
...generally f**king about in a most uncommon way until some responsible sod (1st world country) shows him the way home with an assertive nudge to the shoulder....
....returning home to his mothers bosom with a big toothy grin and sense of achievement.
Go CX!!!