Reinhardt
No you don't need to be a fighter pilot to be an ETP. Plenty of rotary and multi guys.
There is at least one civvy self sponsored ETP. I met her at a GAPAN do a couple of years ago. Very impressive she was too.
Airliner type formation is more tricky than with a glass dome above you yes, particularly from the left seat in echelon left. It is fine until you get just a tiny out of position vertically (who would ever do that!), but then you lose the other guy.
The reason they were probably bending forward and looking up and right is that on the break it is a different matter, where you really do lose all visuals as soon as you roll in. It should not be a problem on the break as long as everyone breaks the same, however human nature and airmanship means you try to keep the preceeding guy visual.