And just what is the Conservative's policy on defence? I only ask because, and this might just be me being a bit thick or short sighted (both a very realistic possibility these days!), for a party that thinks the defence should be the first priority of government ....
Actually scrap that past point. I think I've answered my own question. On re-reading his speech to the party faithful at the last conference, I thought Mr Fallon had said Defending the country was the first duty of government. He didn't; he said "the first duty of government is to keep Britain safe". And that is most definitely not the same as defending the country being the first duty of government. Defending your home from intruders would be claymores on the front lawn, HMGs mounted on a watchtower overlooking the back fence, big dogs with sharp teeth and a car that explodes if someone tries to pinch it. Keeping your home safe would be making sure the roof doesn't leek, that your little ones don't put the cat in the washer for fun or stick their fingers in the plug sockets, that aunt Mavis doesn't trip over the loose carpet on the landing. Defence and safety, two very different things.
So now I've cleared that up in my own mind, just what EXACTLY is the Conservative policy on defence? I looked and I've looked and I can't find it anywhere (this is probably me being thick). All I can see when I go to the Conservative's website is cutting the deficit. That might be part of keeping us safe, after all we are fortunate enough to have "Prime Minister who puts defence at the top of his priorities. And a Chancellor who understands that strong defence depends on a strong economy." Lucky us.
And then I looked at Conservativehome.com, allegedly the home of Conservatism. The closest I could find to a statement on the Conservative Defence policy was an article slamming the Labour Shadow Defence Secretaries since 2010.
Not to worry I thought, maybe it's still in draft format, what with an election looming - they're titivating it. So I had a look at their Euro election manifesto as a pointer to what might be in their next big manifesto. Errrrrrrrrr. Found it. Page 24 of 28, tucked away just behind farming, fishing and agricultural policy. The key points in the first paragraph on security - note not defence - is on mass migration, poverty and spreading democracy.
I was starting to worry by now. An election round the corner but no hint of any sort of policy put out there to say how they planned to keep us safe and secure for the next 5 years. So I read Mr Fallon's conference speech again in case I'd missed something. Apparently not.
It seems Mr Fallon is keen to take credit for the delivery of a more agile armed forces with lots of hard working reserves (apparently citizens twice over) who will get a new decoration for 10 years service and for fixing the defence budget which means they can spend £164 billion over the next 10 years. Although spent it on what he doesn't say - people, pay, paper clips, hugely wasteful contracts that don't deliver what we need on time? Your guess is as good as mine. But fear not, all is not lost. Mr Fallon is keen to trumpet 7 new hunter killers for the RN, more new fighters, surveillance aircraft and new transport planes for the RAF and 600 new Scout vehicles for the Army.
Erm, sorry to be a pain Mr Fallon, but weren't they nearly all pretty much squared away before your time? In fact how many of those programmes were squared away whilst 'call me Dave' was still campaigning for his seat in Parliament back in 2001? Given all this Mr Fallon, just what is the plan for Defence? I mean you do have one don't you???? And I mean other than pissing everybody off so they leave and then snatching people from the jaws of despair by employing them on the Defence equivalent of a zero hours contract i.e. You want something for nothing.
After all this, I came to the conclusion that Defence is royally screwed and that to get anywhere in the Armed Forces of tomorrow I realistically need to be a Reservist working in J8 Finance. Only then will I have a voice and a role that might actually mean something.
The storm clouds are gathering, and given the current state of the world I have a horrible feeling that Winston's gathering storm could well look like a light spring breeze by comparison if we're not careful.