Dark and Stormys
In the Cock and Feather in Hamilton one evening, the wrong side of quite a few of these -it's amazing how innocuous they taste- Our skipper, one A*** S**** made a terrible mistake. It all went in slow motion but in the crowded bar on the balcony looking over the harbourside where the cruise ships were disgorging thousands of pax, he inadvertently knocked off the ash from his fag on one of the most perfectly rounded female bottoms on the island. So far, so good. Where it all went wrong was when he tried to brush it off with the back of his hand, dropping the fag at the same time. The outraged owner of said bum spun round and clouted the woman standing the other side of Andy while he was bent over retrieving his errant snout.
The crew just managed to drag the bemused and slightly surprised skipper out of the bar as this humungous cat fight developed into an audience participation game. "Lucky to get out of there in time" he declared.
Bless