Dear ISIL,
Our Air Force would like to thank you for the recent order.
At certain times, we may have a slight delay in delivery as we seek to fulfil other urgent customer requests as well.
However, rest assured you order is important to us, we will process this as soon as is possible.
In keeping with our standard terms and conditions, none of this order is returnable after delivery.
In the event that our order doesn't reach you at the designated delivery address, please call, we can be contacted 24 hours a day on our freephone number.
You may have be put on hold for a short period of time, this is enable us to arrange speedy delivery to the new coordinates provided.
We do operate a 24 hour delivery service so rest assured we are always able to please.
As per our terms and conditions we will notify the press, er you, our esteemed customer 12 hours after delivery.
As you appreciate we have an ongoing customer referral program.
We will happily despatch to your colleagues at a moments notice.
There is no charge for this service. All you need do is provide us with their name, position in the organisation and coordinates.
We understand they may want to share in, our, er your joy at such an unexpected surprise and will happily add in any gift message you may wish to add.
Thanking you in anticipation for your order.
We sadly do not offer much in the may of repeat business.
Our aim is to deliver to you correctly, First Time-Every Time and believe you will never require a redelivery.
Thank you
Customer Service Delivery Department
In the event that some material is not available we reserve the right to substitute material which we feel is more relevant and do the job we require.
We also reserve the right to modify delivery vehicle, however rest assured you definitely get more bang for you buck than other services
In the event you are unhappy with our service after delivery, please call Better Business Bureau.