When they are old enough and reading, try a copy of
"On the Psychology of Military Incompetence" as a primer?
Darned good read, pity most of the VSOs have never read AND digested! !
I picked up a copy in Cirencenster Oxfam a year ago - I hadn't read it since IOTC some 30 odd-year earlier. However, apart from the examples of military incompetence, the analysis is somewhat dated in psychological terms - strong emphasis on potty training, anal retentiveness etc.