If the Pals Battalions of WW1 could see Dewsbury, Oldham, Rochdale, et al today they would quite literally wonder what country they were in.
Madhouse Britain...
Blackboard = "chalkboard"
Vicious thug = "differently moraled"
Manhole = "person hole"
How about err, "Personchester United"
Or err, "Postperson Pat, Postperson Pat, Postperson Pat
And his vertically challenged, multicoloured feline quadruped"
Come on children. Sing along...