That's the sort of sadism normally reserved for the military, have you served in the past or is it a jock thing? Bloody funny all the same. I don't know where exactly you fly from but I have spent several months in Northern Norway with the military in the past and the local fish based cuisine was stinking, thankfully the military brought in their own food. One of this lads had a winter wife who was a horror and stank of fish but she was loaded as her family owned the local fish processing plant so she could afford drinks in the local bars and she used to taxi the boys around in a plush merc so happy days I suppose.