fobotsco - not sure how you think that a PPRuNe moderator could be in a position to "know the facts" that you demand he state? However, I am sure that they would be delighted to see a RAF bluntie "in the know" state these facts on their behalf. I did hear today on Radio 5 that this was a "major error" by "somebody on the base" who visited the wife in question shortly after "the event" and stated the things that she was - quite rightly - totally upset and distressed by. This same news item also stated that she would be allowed to stay in her married quarter for a "minimum of 6 months, and longer if necessary" and that no such letters of demand for repayment of salary would have been sent by the MOD.
I suspect that this whole shambles has been caused by an insensitive **** of a scribbly, probably civil servant, (sorry if that shows my prejudice) wrongly reading the "rules" and misinterpreting them and dashing off round to her house to show how "on top of the rules" he was.
Agreed - sack him - but don't dish the dirt to the system, which in my nearly 40 years of experience has always dealt really well with those in need under such circumstances.