I have been PPruNeing for at least five years, and this is the ****tiest post I have ever seen, bar none.
Arrogant, sexist, insensitive - and that's before we get to what passes for your sense of priorities.
I look forward to Mr. monkey posting snaps of himself, his wife (if indeed such a poor creature exists) and his children. Failing that his siblings and parents will do.
Come on Mr. Amazon:- we know what you despise. Give us something to admire>