I hate admitting this, but from that day, I have refused to give one penny to these well wishing charities.
Years ago I too had a concern about just how much of a donation actually arrived where needed, or was spent on essential items. Addressing that concern led me to
Medecins Sans Frontieres (MSF) - at the time a lot smaller organisation than they are now. I heartily commend them as an organisation that achieves very impressive results in lots of very dangerous places (and does not get bogged down in bureaucracy).