Autobit - Yes they would have known. Yes they should have known anyway. Its a small service. A small family. My opinion is at these sort of events, if there is nothing in it for them, they will not attend. To me, they way I was brought up, they way it was-this is a very bad sign.
Shows a lack of something. It was my close observation of many of them when I was serving there. Thankfully I no longer am.