PPRuNe Forums - View Single Post - The Most Embarrassing Private Jet Flight Of All Time
Old 5th Nov 2013, 08:14
  #4 (permalink)  
First.officer
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: UK
Posts: 448
Likes: 0
Received 2 Likes on 1 Post
Ah, yes......had to use the toilet in anger myself of a Citation CJ a few years ago coming back from IBZ......sudden onset of stomach cramp, no choice but to go (or fill my boxers in situ!). Anyway, luckily we had no passengers, but still not a pleasant feeling to have to go back, secure a poly-vinyl sheet with poppers, raise the seat (which then props on your back as you vacate your bowels) and let nature release it's fury - the relief was a joy to behold, but that passes once the delicate scent of an upset stomach pervades the cabin ("wasn't me, didn't do it" - that ain't gonna work here my friends!). Anyway, job finished and then comes the contortionist act that is the finale of the whole act (*drum roll).....anyone ever tried to wipe their behind, trousers round ankles, in the equivalent of your wardrobe, almost as dark, and propping the seat lid open with one hand, reaching for toilet roll with the other?? - and then "wipe"! it's an art worthy of a Chinese acrobat, and the whole experience is compounded if you have an episode akin to giving a baby a warm chocolate bar to eat

Glad I could share that with you all.....

F/o
First.officer is offline