it's bad enough that you have to listen to an (often) patronising brief (aimed at lowest common denominator et al),
Oh, so you believe that every other person in that cabin with you is an expert on all types of different airliners, that knows everything there is to know about traveling on the airlines and that they can learn absolutely nothing new. They are all real experts, like you seem to think you are.
Anything that can get the attention of passengers for the safety briefing is good. Well, except for real professional passengers such as you, that is incapable of learning some thing new, seeing you think you know it all.
I would bet that I have traveled a hell of a lot more on the airlines than you have. When the safety briefing starts, I stop what I am doing, then watch and listen to the Flight Attendant's speech or videoed safety briefing, no matter how many times I've heard it or how many times I've traveled or actually flown that type of aircraft.
But I'm very impressed that you must know a hell of a lot more about aircraft than I do, after all I only flew them for 42 years.