Lone wolf,
Absolutely, you can decline to follow atc's instructions and at SFO it can result in a very elongated approach, just as with JFK. However, I always decline 180/5 and I've spent 10 years politely refusing the rope that the controllers at SFO love to offer you. 747 slows down very nicely from 160 kts till 4! There is no excuse to follow a dumb atc request, there's even less excuse to give one in my opinion.
As for 'my beef' with the aids, well I'm a lover of flying the thing like I rented it and wrapping round the corner as much as the next man, but, the passengers pay to be flown from a to b as safely as possible. I've no doubt in my ability to get in from 4 miles downwind at iAD, at night, on a visual but is it easier, therefore safer, to get radar vectors to an 8 mile final? When im as tired as should be expected at the end of a 10 hr flight should we be trying to make it as easy as possible or should I be demonstrating my circuits? If I'm given a choice then they'll be times I have take the visual option, they'll also be times I monitor the jet getting me close to , or on to, the runway. My beef is I like options, the FAA and many of your colleaugues don't think they're necessary.