Care & Compassion For Check Captains
My last post was designed to provoke discussion. It was about the inappropriate behaviour patterns of a minority of Check Captains. Now let us look at the Human Factor's Side. Let us nuture them and ourselves.
Each of us is doing the best we can to survive. Our method of operating in this world is driven by our Ego and from our experiences during our formative years up through to our teens. We all have our own unique gifts and we also have our own flaws - some of which we may not be conciously aware of.
If you experience agressive behaviour from another team member or have even noticed yourself behaving that way then you or the other person may just be in survival mode, doing your best to survive in this world and not even aware of what is lurking in the subconcious mind that is actually driving that behaviour.
Let us now treat the Check Captain with compassion. This also can be applied to other team members in a position of Command, Departmental Manager, Check Captains, CASA FOI's and independant ATO's etc. and any team member that is in charge of Training and Assessment and of course yourself!!
The development of the ego takes place from the ealiest times of our development right up to our teens. So we develop behavioural methods that help us to survive that may or may not be seen as appropriate by others. Yet we ourselves may not be aware that our behaviour is not constructive and also not aware of what is driving it.
Whenever a basic need is not met ( or inappropriately met), it results in some form of psychological wounding. This wounding can result from either real or imagined situations.
Then two things may happen:
1. A deccision is made about how the world is (our reality)
2. There is a behaviour response in the form of either resistance or submission.
This locks us into behaviour patterns which in many cases have their basis in early childhood.
It would well be that you're actions and reactions to various situations in life are being run by bad experiences you had early on in life that are now buried in your subconcious mind and that you are not aware of what is triggering this behaviour.
Be aware the each of us is doing the best we can to survive in life generally and especially in our career. We may be acting appropriately or inappropriately and yet not even aware of what is driving that.
What about the Check Captain who appears to be aggressive and unreasonable? Is he really aware of why he or she is behaving that way? That person may have had a really abusive childhood and has learnt that the only way to be in control is by using fear as a method of survival so that they themselves will not be in a position where they are not in control. Yet their lives may well be run by something that is still in their subconcious mind that they had long forgotton. Something that wounded them when they were very young. Yet they are doing the best they can because they don't know any other way.
LET US GIVE THEM SOME HELP AND COMPASSION.
How about Departmental Managers and Human Resources departments set up a means of indepent councelling or therapy for any team member is demonstrating inappropriate behaviour.
In my case I was compulsivly spending time looking after other people's needs and totally forgot about my own needs and paid the price for it. Thus I sought some feedback and now have a choice around how I react to various challenges in life.
I myself have looked at ways of improving how I survive and operate in this world and have sort out means of getting feedback by enrolling in an online course that was inexpensive and yet extremely valuable. Very simple - you log into the site, answer the questionare and then get the feedback in the form of possibilities. You are not judged but you can choose which from the list of options that you think may be your own unique gifts and also your possible flaws. Then it gives you methods by which you can change. You can also ask for a "Change Agent" to assist if you need further guidance or even therapy.
I do not run any of these companies nor am I here to promote them.
But I have benefited from being made aware of the possibilities of why I operate the way I do, my possible good traits and the things that trigger me to operate inappropriately and now I have a choice of changing my responses to things that press my buttons.
If any of you would like some suggestions on where to go and look for these courses then send me a message and I will discreetly give you some options.
LET US TREAT EACH OTHER WITH COMPASSION
REMEMBER TO LOOK AFTER YOURSELF ASWELL
There are a number of self help courses on the internet. The best one is Australian owned, is not expensive and non confrontational.
MAYBE THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS FAILURE - IT IS FEEDBACK.
WE ALL HAVE TO TAKE RESPONSIBILITY AT SOME POINT.