Proceedures
You sound quite interesting.
You are obviously extremely thorough and methodical, which may pay off well when it comes to actual training, but I fear you are over-thinking things and trying to run before you can walk.
Your little sim flight yesterday was never going to go well.
The very worst thing you can do in flying training is progress to the next stage before you have mastered the last. You attempted to do everything at once, and even the best can't do that.
I would echo what the previous poster said. Don't try to learn in the sim by yourself. It will just teach you bad habits. Even military/commercial full motion sims are "ok" at best despite what the manufacturers say, and pc based once are a laugh but essentially dross with a few uses in practising for your IR perhaps.
You are in a rare position by the sound of it in that you have the money to do this properly.
My advice.
1. Find out if you have what it takes to be a pilot before you embark on a very very expensive journey.
This is not as easy as it sounds, because a school just wants your money. A bad pilot will make them more money in training than a good one. My suggestion would be to research a good flight instructor that is an inconvenient distance from where you live. Ideally somebody in a different state. Offer him a good lump of cash to give you an honest assessment of your flying aptitude.
Explain to him that whatever his answer you will only ever have two 2 hour lessons from him and that you want him to spend the 4 hours working out whether you have what it takes to be a competent single pilot IFR jet pilot. This way he has nothing to gain from blowing smoke up your arse about you being the next Chuck Yeager.
2. Assuming the answer is positive, find another good instructor who is local and convenient. When I say a good instructor, I mean someone that instructors think is good rather than students. My suggestion for both would be ex military flying instructors. I say this not because there are not fantastic civilian instructors out there, but because the quality is more variable, plus military guys are more likely to be teaching out of choice rather than as a stepping stone to gain hours and are used to telling people when they are below standard, which is a difficult skill.
Explain to this instructor that you are not interested in the quickest/cheapest route to your PPL/CPL/ATP etp, but the best. I would emphasise this is not because I think you should waste money on training, but because I think it could actually save you money in the long run. Getting the basics absolutely nailed at the beginning whilst flying a relatively cheap cessna for an extra couple of hours to really put the polish on your skills at a tenth of the cost of your kingair time will pay for itself many times over. Pay that little extra to have some basic aeros training. Really explore spins and fully developed stalls etc. Get it all out of your system in a cheap and cheerful light aircraft with an instructor who is comfortable near aircraft limits. You are not looking for the cheapest route to an airliner cockpit where you will be a systems manager for the rest of your career and basic skill are seen as generally unimportant. You actually want to be a pilot, which is laudable, and with that you need good skills.
3. Job permitting, give yourself over to this full time.
Flying training is exhausting.
You need to try to fly 5 days a week. You wont always acheive this, but if you maintain that level of currency you don't waste money relearning stuff.
You need weekends off. Performance and morale will suffer if you burn out.
You must not fly more than 2 hrs a day, less in the early days. If you can maintain concentration for more than 2 hrs, then you are not concentrating hard enough. This does not mean there is not a lot of studying/planning/briefing/debriefing to be done as well. I have spent a lot of time involved in the military flying training system, and it is incredibly apparent when a student is given too much in one day. The performance falls off a cliff. It is a waste of time and money and very demoralising.
4. Do become an instructor. Not for the money but for the learning experience
5. Don't self educate any more. The aim is laudable, but the effect is punitive.
Now some questions.
Why a VLJ?
Learning to fly a KingAir to prepare you for a VLJ is a bit the wrong way round. Little jets up to and including straight winged citations etc are a lot easier to fly than a KingAir, and less capable in almost every way. Don't get me wrong, I think a KingAir is a brilliant aircraft in many ways, I just think it may be a mistake to move past it onto something else. The KingAir is almost purpose built for your circumstances. Bulletproof engines.Range of sizes. Range of range/endurance options(350ER is continent crossing). Excellent single pilot cockpit -proline21. Viceless handling. Good top speed, but slows down nicely if it has all got a bit frantic.