Dispose of F27 and DOC zero is a possibility.
Your project is an interesting diversion from the usual tech log threads, though not the first of this type.
Care to share with us more of the actual details of the project that you have been set? Does it seriously have to keep flying or can you consider parking it in a tourist area and turn in into a coffee shop, cocktail bar or similar? It could be called "Get Fokkered". Any other names?