I'm a little curious about that too. I joined an airline, from the RAF, almost exactly one year ago. Much to my surprise it wasn't a collection of clueless amateurs regularly plunging their aircraft into the sea but instead an assortment of generally pleasant professionals who do a good job, day in day out. I did not expect, nor did I receive, a ticker-tape parade on my joining the company and I pleased to say (although not surprised) that the company don't ring me on a daily basis asking how things were done in the RAF and what laying on of hands i can offer to help the company reach new heights
Instead, I go into work, fly from A to B, am treated courteously, enjoy what i do, get paid a decent enough wage and at the end of the day I go home and get on with my life. It will wear thin, I know that, but the upshot is my time off is my own and if I want extracurricular "duties" then I have to go looking for them. If not, work ends when I log off post flight in the Crewroom.
Military flying experience, if you have enough of it, is recognised by airlines - they're not idiots (on the whole that is - there are HR depts and recruitment agencies that might challenge that assertion). That said, there are a lot of experienced non-military types chasing the same jobs as you.
Airlines aren't charities and the world doesn't owe you a living however many of them like a spread of experience so take on, where they can, a mix of military, experienced civilian and the odd cadet. Admittedly the market is pretty flat at the moment and jobs are a little scarce. Airlines are looking for the path of least resistance when recruiting at the moment so, all other things being equal, someone with 3000hrs and a type rating beats a military (or Civvy) pilot with 4000hrs and no rating.
There isn't an "anti-military" vendetta out here, just the usual ebb and flow of market forces. Just don't join the fray expecting to held aloft as the saviour of civilian aviation. You're not and nor will you ever be.
PS. My experience of civilian aviation so far suggests that, on balance, the RAF could learn more from the civilian world than vice versa. Just IMHO of course....
