Archimedes, not being 'in British military circles' nor an avid reader of the 1895 edition of Punch I completely missed the subtle nature of your comment. My mistake. Please forgive me.
I think you're being too harsh when assessing your likely utility should things go pear-shaped in Asia. You could have your chaps bring along some copies of Punch, then rather than laughing at you we'd both be laughing at the same thing :-)