The comment about "weighing" an aircraft by measuring Tq in the hover reminds me about a thread on here.
There was a thread about a guy who wanted to learn to fly but thought he was too overweight. I was amazed at how many people did not have a clue about performance. One poster even mentioned how he did a check ride in an overweight aircraft "but it was fine"
Performance, thrust margin.....or the ability to do work. What ever you call it, if you are paying lip service to AUM, you are also probably clueless of blasé about how much "work" you can get out of an aircraft.
It is down to instructors to instill the correct thought process about performance and planning, a gash attitude at the beginning leads to gash unthinking pilots.
I would only overload the aircraft if it was to save a life, and after a measured decision, there was no other way to achieve the aim.
I have refused pax in Afghanistan that would take me over corrected AUM. Any extra weight would:
1. Reduce my performance available - not acceptable
2. Limit my options in an emergency-not acceptable
3. Reduce my ability to fight the aircraft-only a foolhardy, cocky, arrogant pilot would give that ammunition to your enemy.
Take away those emotive factors, and I cannot see any reason why you would choose to play on the bounds of safety. There are old pilots and bold pilots.....but no old bold pilots.