David,
Interesting that you are an ATC cadet. It is truly amazing how high is the percentage of civil pilots that started in the cadets.
Can I be rude and ask what on earth is the personal problem that has put you off applying for training in the RAF? You have to be prepared to crawl over broken glass to get into aviation so. to me. a personal problem that immediately rules out this approach seems rather strange. Just bear in mind that in my day, the selection for a Flying Scholarship was basically the same as for aircrew selection- and I doubt that it has changed.
The other advice that I would give is don't get locked on to a lifetime of flying small aircraft. The qualifications required for an A340 are not that different to those for a small Cessna...and the A340 captain can fly the Cessna in his own time, which cannot usually be said for the Cesna pilot.