Thanks guys for the warm words.
During my training instructor told me "don't listen what people say do what law says"
but I didn't get this lesson. Now I did. And will remember it.
I really feel sorry for my passengers, they trusted me their lives and I had no right taking any risks.
I am happy that I still alive and surprisingly for many others I want to fly much more than I did before and I want to be the safest pilot.
This incident completely changed my view of flying and valuables in life and I can only regret that I didn't think like that before.
Thank you for reading this I feel much better now.