From many years experience of many clubs, I can recommend a few which were mostly free of pompous or unfriendly types;
Yes, BGGC (albeit one known sociopath when I was there), North Hill, Cambridge (who did have a amazingly unpleasant CFI when I was there, known for getting into punch-ups; eventually drummed out of the country thank god. Other than that, lovely members and staff), and then if your bag is to turn up and fly; then Lasham ticks all the boxes (apart from being a bit impersonal). Essex& Suffolk - a bit fuddy-duddy but generally friendly. Edit - oh and Oxford (WOG) - a nicer club I have yet to come across.
I came across the similar number of clubs which ranged from cliquey to downright unfriendly. So yes, IMO, certain clubs do seem to develop their own personality, but of course that can change over time, and overall they seem to be getting better with their
PR push.