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Old 19th Nov 2002, 22:44
  #30 (permalink)  
boofhead
 
Join Date: Feb 2000
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Sorry Captain Danny, I can't help myself:

Joe Sixpack went to visit his kin in San Francisco some time last year. Joe knows that 90% of all airline accidents are caused by pilot error but also knows that the chance of an accident on his flight is very small. He also knows that compared to pilot error, terrorist activity is even less likely, so unlikely that he can ignore it. He was able to arrive at LAX forty five minutes prior to the departure time, park his car and give his check-in bags to the Skycap. After going through security, he picked up a cup of coffee before arriving at the Gate, where he was issued a boarding pass. The flight departed on schedule, and Joe had a good time.
When he goes again in 2003, he will find confusion and delays. Joe now knows that there are terrorists out there who are willing to give their lives if they can take his, but he also knows that like other dangerous situations, he is responsible for his own safety and if anyone tries to take over HIS airplane that will be the last thing they ever do.
He will need to arrive hours before the departure time, and instead of the Skycap he will have to cart his bags to the CTX scanner that takes up most of the check-in area. If he is lucky his bag will go through easily, and he will only have to wait half an hour. There are a lot of people in the concourse, it is very hot and uncomforable, and Joe remembers the shoot out last year at the El Al counter. He looks around warily but there are so many people he cannot watch them all. He gives up, and waits his turn patiently. The security staff asks him to open his bag, and if he cannot find the key quickly, they will cut the lock off. His belongings will be tossed around, as the security staff are looking for the explosives they know Joe is carrying. When they don't find them, they will release Joe to proceed to the check-in counter, where he will hand over his bag and show several forms of ID. Another long line.
Next Joe has to join the conga line for personal security, and he has to empty his pockets, pull out his laptop and put it through separately, make sure his glasses, pen, coins and such are not in his pockets. Unfortunately for Joe, today the security staffers have turned up the sensitivity since they have been told they have not met their quota for the day. Joe's scanner beeps, and he now has to take off his shoes and stand on the spot while the man with the wand runs it over his body. "Do you mind if I frisk you?" asks the man, as he runs his hands up and down Joe's torso and legs, and puts the wand into his crotch. "Pull down your belt buckle," he is told. Joe knows that the man is aching to perform a cavity search so he bites his tongue.
Joe passes the check, the security wallah is disappointed that he did not turn out to be a criminal after all, and puts his shoes back on. He collects all his belongings, and suddenly is alarmed by the sounds of shouts "Clear the area! Security alert!" Joe and all the other potential pasengers are hustled out of the terminal building, onto the sidewalk, where they stand and wait for two hours. Apparently someone found that a scanner had had the power cord kicked out in the next-door terminal, and as a precaution the terminals on both sides, as well as the one affected, had to be evacuated while a search was made for the terrorist who had done the dirty deed. Of course it was not a terrorist, only a clumsy staffer who was afraid to admit it, and thousands of Joe's fellow passengers were inconvenienced but hey, that's what security is all about, right?
After Joe has repeated all the security stuff, with another, more intense body search, he finally makes it to the Gate. He has given up on the flight he had made the booking for, and will take any flight. Luckily for Joe there is a seat available soon, and Joe has to take off his shoes again for another body search (he has heard the security staffers discuss that they needed just four more passengers to make up the day's quota and it only seems right that they pick Joe. He is experienced, after all).
As Joe takes his seat and looks forward to buying a $4 beer, he reflects that the $35 security tax he paid on his ticket has been well spent.

Now tell me, how many times will Joe (and Josephine) put up with this cr@p? Don't you think that they will drive or go by train? Since Sep 11 United, for one, has seen a 20% drop in passenger numbers. After the full disaster of "Airport Security" Part Two kicks in, you better believe that this number will increase. If the aim is better security, it will not be achieved by treating passengers as criminals, and the present system is pure show. If the aim is to destroy the airlines, then it is going well.
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