This is a marvellous PA from the cabin crew after a hairy Go Around...
I have flown with captains who have made abysmal PAs, to the point I wanted to wrench the mic out of their hand. After an oil leak (a pipe had worked itself loose during flight) and subsequent maintenance action on the ground, the captain made a number of PAs advising passengers what was going on as it happened. The number of times he emphasised in his PA's that the "large number of people looking into the right hand engine is purely for SAFETY REASONS" was commensurate with the number of times the senior poked her head into the cockpit to remind us the passengers were wetting themselves.
Although only a humble FO, I keep it short. "Ladies and Gentlemen, it's your Captain/FO speaking, may I have a moment of your attention. Some of you may have noticed an unusual smell/noise a moment ago, and as a precaution for technical reasons we are now returning to XXX. We will be on the ground in approximately 10-15 minutes so i'd ask you to remain seated with your seatbelts securely fastened. I'm sorry for the inconvenience this may cause, but we will be departing for YYY as soon as the issue is rectified."
Working for a LoCo also presents opportunities to be humorous during PAs for non safety critical incidents - after a diversion to Birmingham due to snow: "Ladies and Gentlemen, your attention please. A number of you will be aware of the weather conditions currently affecting the London area and we have just received notice from XXX that they are currently unable to accept incoming aircraft. The good news, is that Birmingham are still feeling hospitable and are looking forward to our arrival, where we will make onward travel arrangements for you. Most importantly, please rest assured, this slightly more circuitous route to London will of course be provided free of charge. We will be landing in 15 minutes."
Horgy