Story can be adapted to local situation.
Soldier in full combats, enters pub and says to barman: “Paddy (or whatever) give me a pie and pint and look sharp about it”.
The barman replies that he can’ serve the soldier ‘cause there’s an IRA man (or whatever) sitting in the corner and if the barman serves the soldier, the IRA man (or whatever) will blow up the pub.
The soldier crosses over to the man in the corner and asks if he’s the ‘whatever’ and gets a response in the affirmative – explain to Army audience that this means; YES. The soldier draws his bayonet and with two quick slashes he separates the ‘whatever’s’ ears from his head. He picks up the ears and returns to the bar where he says to the barman; “Now give me a pie and pint and no more of your lip”.
The pie and beer are produced in record time and the soldier slices the pie in half, puts the ears inside and starts to chomp away.
The barman (and most of you prunners) are aghast at this and he says to the soldier; “You’re the roughest, toughest British soldier I’ve ever seen; are you SAS, Parachute Regt or Commandos?”.
“None of those” says the soldier “I’m Pioneer Corps”