I don't get the American culture that is obsessed with upgrades as part of an entitlement within a FF scheme.
Maybe you should try flying in the USA a bit more before you start using words like 'obsessed.'
It is quite normal in the USA for passengers in FF schemes to receive upgrades as part of the package and thus they have expectations.
However, FF schemes (or some first class tickets) often do not provde access to lounges unless fees are paid for a membership scheme.
Different strokes for different folks.