PRAGMATIC!
You'll be coming out with obscenities like 'Risk Assessment', 'Health and Safety' and 'Data Protection Act' next. Let's not get confused between 'BBQ' and that unique British experience, 'British BBQ'.
From Encyclopedia Britannica (probably):
British BBQ (arch). Requirements: One dead-carbon-based-lifeform-powered black orb ((c) Beagle 2011), a light drizzle/heavy downpour and a group of friends/taunters watching the wretched process from the safety of the back door with a hop based beverage.
Remember - all problems are soluble in alcohol. Now let's have no more defeatist (aka gas faggot) talk.
