I've been very hesitant to join in this discussion, but given PiolotDAR's encouragement, I think I will.
Firstly, I'd like to say I feel Whirlygig and Ferny were prefectly within their rights to raise this. Whilst the intention of the post was not to be sexist, "fraternity" does show the implicit sexism in the langauage. As someone (IO?) pointed out, masculine encompasses feminine an many languages, and I wonder why that is?!
Also, huge credit to PilotDAR. There seem to be a lot of people who get very defensive when faced with questions of sexism, racism, etc, another group who make glib jokes to prove they meant no harm (those jokes stem from a sexist or racist culture), and very few who have the integrity to apologise and make it clear what they had meant in the first place. I take my hat off to you.
But as for the real issue, in my mind, its the difficulty of the word equality. Fuji's point has validity, but not just relating to men and women. We are not all equal, and we are all different. Whether it's because one person can give birth, or another can carry heavier loads, or a third can do unimaginably complicated maths easily (engineers?), the thing is that we rarely celebrate the differences, and treat each other with respect. I am sure we have all experienced that exculsivity from others in our pasts, and if we haven't, then I suspect that is more because we are being exclusive to others, rather than it not existing.
And that was the point of PilotDARs post, I think. The inclusive nature of the .... aviator (phew, that was hard to find a gender neutral word....goes to show!).
PD asked Whirly what to do, what could make a difference. Well, I've been asked the same from a racist perspective, and I try and say the following.
If you are the receiver of racism/sexism etc, politely pick up the point and make sure the person who was being unmindful realises it.
If you are the source of the racist/sexist statement, however unwittingly, then accept that what you said may have been inconsiderate or ill-judged, rephrase the statement, and don't try to defend it. (As far as I can see, that's exactly what PilotDAR did).
We aren't going to obliterate centuries (millenia) of habit in a blink of an eye, but if we start by accepting it exists, may offend, and can be corrected, that's a good place. As whirly said, don't just make assumptions like the man would obviously be the pilot...and if you do and it turns out you were wrong....don't resort to sexist jokes to try and "make it okay". Just say sorry, and move on.
Now....all of you can shout at me :-)
IPZ