Pinky this may help....
The author of this little ditty probably prefers to remain anonymous. The poem will be best appreciated by the current and ex-PNG pilots.
A little background for those not "in the know":
The Civil Aviation Department (regulatory body) operated a Kingair and on one occasion it ran out of fuel and glided into Port Moresby.
The Port Moresby Gliding Club
A group of young enthusiasts
Met at a local pub
To talk about a common love
The Port Moresby Gliding Club.
Their membership was very low
The running costs were high,
They needed some dramatic act
To catch the public's eye.
"I've got a good idea" said one
"Been planning it all day,
I'll try it out tomorrow
When coming back from Lae."
The flight to Lae was wonderful
The aircraft right on track,
They had no reason to suspect
The drama coming back.
Their business done, they climbed aboard
One had a bulging bilum
The Captain chuckled to himself,
"The last ten miles will thrill 'em".
This trick will have no impact
If I fill her up with fuel,
I'll take enough for top of climb
And glide in from Mount Yule.
They flew along as smooth as silk
With not a single jolt,
But as they got to Galley Reach
Both donks groaned to a halt.
The Captain said "Thank Christ they've stopped
They make a dreadful din,
I'll now complete this exercise
And glide the bastard in."
A glider is a lovely thing
You see them everywhere,
Some metal, others wood and glue
But never a KingAir!
With noses flat against the glass
The victims watched in horror,
And none of them had any doubt
They'd all be dead tomorra.
He held her on the centre line
He called the tower and said,
"For f**ks sake make me number one
I'm landing straight ahead."
He put it down right on the keys
and made sure he was clear,
Then smilingly he turned and said,
"I think we need a beer."
The Aero Club looks very nice
Looks like its just been painted,
But there was no-one to answer him
The bloody lot had fainted!
Wes turned and looked him in the eye
He said "Thank Christ that's ended!
It really won't surprise me
If your licence is suspended!
Those passengers we've got on board
Look like they're in a trance,
But now you must excuse me
'Cos I think I've shat my pants!"
When Joe Wal heard it on the 'phone
His hands flew to his head,
His eyes stood out like organ stops
"F**k me" was all he said.
But when heard the details
Of this history making flight,
His eyes lit up with interest
And he thought of it all night.
For Joe has always longed to fly
Although it made him dizzy,
But this bloke here could show him how
On days he wasn't busy.
So Joe signed up on the spot
They headed for the pub,
Now Joe's the latest member
Of the Moresby Gliding Club.
Sir Julius picked up his 'phone and heard
A voice known far and wide,
"This Grumman that arrives next month
- I wonder how that glides?"
(A bilum is a PNG-made string bag.)
(Joe Wal was the head of the Department.)
(Sir Julius was the Prime Minister at the time.)