I have a great deal of sympathy for the OP, perhaps more than most contributors to the thread. It appears that the ground staff fell way short of differentiatiting between the needs of the various passenger groups. Anyone who has ever travelled with a dependant passenger, child or older person needing assistance, should empathise with the plight he found himself in. Perhaps a certain amount of naivety (sp?) in not listening to his other half and attempting to get on board with the first wave of incoming SLF.
Without wishing to sound too patronising, perhaps he should look at the culture of the carrier he is travelling with. My own airline has changed market from purely shorthaul around UK and western europe to include middle eastern and other destinations. We regularly see passengers completely flouting the carry on baggage rules. Cabin crew are the last line of defence. Being a western airline we have no problems with our female cabin crew being assertive, mainly towards the ground staff, to ensure cabin baggage is appropiate. For my flights this tends to be an ongoing process, throughout the boarding procedure, rather than just relieving the last to board of their carry on items. Despite reminding the ground duty manager of this, inevitably blind eyes are turned and multiple bags arrive at the aircraft door. On a recent flight I had the senior cabin crew member turning apopalectic with frustration as ground staff boarded 2 elderley passengers who needed wheelchair assistance last, on a completely full flight. They were seated toward the rear of a very full cabin, with people struggling to stowe their gear. This was a thoroughly unpleasant and totally unneccessry experience for them.
From the crew's point of view, by the time you're at the aircraft doors, our options are very limited indeed. Perhaps our only way of combatting this is to ensure any delay to the pushbask is apportioned to where it rightly belongs, ground handling and check in.