Watching you post over the years confirms that you never really have gotten over the rejection
It may shock you, but a high percentage of the RAF never have or ever want to be a Pilot. I certainly didn't. I find it amusing that the Aircrew who always claim you 'don't fly mil for the money' get all uppity when anyone else mentions the retention allowance and threatens to storm off in a huff. It is up for discussion along with every other finance-related issue in the military world, no matter how distasteful you find it. Some upcoming cuts will be a big shock to many, given the cuts I see coming in the truly essential capabilities.