Constant night-stopping is painful for any relationship, even if you are used to it. If you are unlucky you'll end up as two individuals who just communicate by telephone, text and email. And, as you said in your own words, you will be at the back of the queue, so what do you say to your other half about the cash you spent getting a licence etc. when you don't have a job. And when you get your first job, do you move? And your second? Do you move the kids?
Your only real choice is to have a really good talk about what you both want. And don't forget, if you want to fly, why not do it privately, but to a high level (say competition level?) or go gliding or even learn to fly an autogyro. Get rid of the flying bugs by doing some. Given the present economic conditions (and those predicted) I'd spend less money and get a copy of Buildings Regs., a Gas Registration ticket and a Part-P so I could do up houses and rent them out. As a side-line I'd do emergency call outs and small jobs. I certainly wouldn't think about flying for a living and I certainly wouldn't recommend that my kids go near it.
So given your choice between flying, in-evitable debt, unemployment and being your girlfriend, I think I'd know which I'd choose!
PM