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Old 9th Nov 2010, 07:10
  #105 (permalink)  
Worrals in the wilds
 
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I have to ask...what is a KPI???
You lucky, lucky person. Think Dilbert.
Generally this means cost cutting, keeping head counts down, etc. while outputting at a higher achievement rating aka working your underlings into the ground.
And for God's sake don't present your superiors with a big bill for vital repairs, necessary equipment, staff training etc, even if it's vital and/or necessary. In many companies, the 'there are no problems only solutions' mantra coupled with KPIs has created a legion of middle managers in operational areas who are terrified of admitting there's a problem or asking for money to fix it, even if they can understand the problem in the first place, which is by no means assured.

Problems then get ignored until they become moot or a crisis (unless the media cottons on). Once they become a crisis the Execs are left looking eggy on TV and desperately trying to pretend that the whole thing's under control, while behind the scenes they're running around asking their underlings; WTF happened? WTF is a gizmo? HTF did it fail? How do we fix it without buying a new bunch of gizmos, because the Board / Minister is starting to get suss but we're still too scared to ask them for any money?

You will notice that the question "how do we fix it properly and improve the system so it doesn't happen again?" does not appear on the list.
The question "How do we build a great product?" is now officially listed as extinct, having not been spotted in the wild since 1985.

I've not worked for QANTAS but this modus calamitas seems to be becoming the norm across all operations based businesses, not just airlines (and it's happening in government departments as well, although in government you don't get sacked for missing KPIs, just transferred to Bedourie or bullied until you leave).

Last edited by Worrals in the wilds; 9th Nov 2010 at 08:05. Reason: spelling, schmelling...
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