I have someone on the inside that is feeding me information direct from the Amber Office.
Plan A was to ensure as many as possible regional airports needed security screening to give the local unemployed something to do. This general principle is now being further developed. But wait for the new twist following the screamingly successful election!
Now that we have a new Government assisted by some well placed independents, Plan B is to install a bullet train between Tamworth and Port Macquarie. All international flights to an from Australia will originate or terminate at one of these two gateway locations. Four people will be employed to fill every job.
This will mean that John and Mary Citizen will use the NSW and other State rail services for onward and efficient travel off the Tamworth/Port Macquarie nexus route.
The railway unions will be much happier and the country will be much richer as result as we all have a share.
All very simple really, you just need to use your imagination and know how to say 'oink oink' at the right time.
The Screamer and his team (note lower case 't') will have very little to do so they will have their function changed to include rail regulation. The Minister will make statements that 'there will be a brilliant set of new regulations expected by mid-2011 including a definitive rule on everything imaginable'. And we will all praise the deserving multitudes.
(Alby Neesa knows that the Screamer and his team will fail to deliver but when you are in Government it is about saying something about what may happen in the future rather than delivering anything which could possibly be construed as an outcome. Those elections come around so quickly everyone will have forgotten anyway!)
Meanwhile, The Screamer and the team will be able to hold meetings, public consultations, conduct the public wringing of hands, the ceremonial shrugs of its not our fault blame but look at the OLDP, and generally spend as many dollars as they need to meet their public but indolent statements of progress.
When something happens The Screamer will tell anyone that its not his fault as he didn't want them to operate in Australia anyway so they took their problems offshore. Bloody good outcome all around!
All too unbelievable I know but don't be surprised if you see the Australian Transport Safety Agency (ATSA) emerge from the post election celebrations.
Remember, you heard the word from Frank first but .....
Frankly, I don't give a damn.