MPN11
...and being close to the FA/CC so that when she she/he says "Tea or Coffee" I don't mis-hear some sexual suggestion
Sounds like you must have had some eventful flights!
TheChitterneFlyer
I've never understood why everyone (mostly everyone) stands-up just prior to the aircraft arriving at the gate. I often wish that the aircraft had to brake hard and that all of those idiots would then fall over in the aisle.
The best (though probably apocryphal) solution I heard was the cabin announcement on landing "Welcome to London Heathrow. Due to our late arrival, we've got a very short turnaround time, so we're looking for volunteer passengers to assist with cleaning the aircraft on arrival. If you'd like to volunteer, please make yourself known to the cabin crew by standing up during our taxi to the gate."