I have flown tankers extensively and have experience in Boeing and Airbus airliners. I believe that the issue of Airbus flight control software in 'combat' is a red-herring.
On a day-to-day basis, tankers are not flown any more aggressively than airliners and the crews are not experienced in handling the aircraft in anything other than a normal manner. With the flight control protections of an Airbus, the worst pilot on the fleet can, aggressively and confidently, apply maximim stick deflection, roll to 67 degrees of bank and achieve a steady 2.5g load factor. A pilot in a conventional tanker aircraft that attempts to manouvre to these parameters will take much longer to achieve them and then won't be able to hold them, or will place themselves in more danger by exceeding aircraft limits or their own ability
I completely agree with BEagle point about CONOPS and I don't believe that emergency manoeuvreing ability is something that is very relevant when comparing the types. However, if you do envisage this attribute as important then do not regard the Airbus flight control system as an impediment that prevents the pilot from wringing maximum performance from the aircraft. Rather it is an advantage that allows pilots to confidently fly the aircraft to limits that are more than adequate for this role.