Ah a good, mostly civilised discussion.
Having sat in both L and R seats in various roles and currently in the right seat my policy has always been to show respect to the captain, until he proves he doesn't deserve it, a very rare event in deed.
My policy is at least once during the trip to refer to him/her as captain or boss early on to set a good tone, ie I understand its his signature on the paperwork. In the company I work for now so far I haven't flown with a captain I woudn't want to fly with again.
I understand it doesn't always happen everywhere for everyone but I find it works for me