Ladies and Gents,
Once more I post, the sun beating at my hopes as I walk around the operators this morning. I try to take smaller steps to reach to their doors as nothing there is waiting for me. Last night I sat with a bunch of guys celebrating one of the pilot’s birthdays drinking, having a laugh wishing that time itself would freeze. Wishing how awesome it would have been to do a two year stretch of seeing wildlife that people pay $2200 a night to see, and flying being free of all ties of all things I call home.
I came here as a 27 year old man, thinking I was the coolest thing Maun would see. Having worked in airports most of my life, having an aeronautical engineering degree, having worked at a space agency and having a fATPL. I thought how could Maun not offer me a job on a plate. It only took me a few days to realise how wrong I was, how wrong I have been about everything. Maun is a forgiving place; I came here being all pompous only to find out that this is probably the last place they want to see that behaviour. The truth is that I’m no better than anyone, and I don’t deserve a job over anybody else. I admit I have made mistakes but at the same time I have tried rectifying them as soon as they became visible. My attitude when I arrived was a mistake, and I like to think that when I leave I would have rectified my mistakes.
All of you have been too kind to me through your posts and PM; I don’t deserve any of your kind comments. But still I thank you all, I remember my parents always telling me that if you’re educated in life then all things you desire would fall at your feet. I love my parents but it has only taken me a little while to prove that there theory was flawed. I certainly educated myself but that’s not what life is all about. I like to think that it doesn’t matter if you’re educated or not. What does matter is that how we treat each other, how we all find common grounds, how we forgive people for the way we have been treated. It’s these simple skills in life that will take us through life. I’m sorry if you feel that I’m being all sentimental, maybe I am. However this thread was for all of us to learn how hard things were and how we need to learn of our mistakes trying to find our first jobs.
I’m certainly no angel, and I would not pretend to be one. But what I will do is carry on with this journey all the way until I reach my destination. Sure I will take breaks, feel down and tired. But who doesn’t feel that way? I’m tired now on this journey and I’m only going home to take a rest. I’m tired of always fighting for my big break. But I will fight all the way though, not to prove to you guys but to prove to myself that all this wasn’t about paying for a type rating and getting hours on a jet. It was about knowing how far I could push my desires and how far I could push myself to find my own limits. I’m not a mummy’s boy by far but I would love to see my mom’s face when she one day sees me in uniform. I don’t think there will be enough money in this world to buy her expression. I hope all our parents are proud and content of what we have become. They do all things in their power to make sure we have the best chance in life.
Coming to Maun and Zambia was not a mistake, far from it. I actually like to think that I will be going home with more than I came with. This journey like all has its ups and downs; I will leave on a up even though I have no job. But I beg you once more time, don’t give up on your journeys, and don’t let people tell you that you can’t become what you want. Find your limits, get to your destination. If you don’t find that you enjoy it when you get there then for sure let it go. But you must get there first. Without the support of you, friends and family I wouldn’t have the courage to walk this path alone but yet I have. Thank you!!
This world is big enough for us all it will find us all a place we call home! But as always, this is not my thread it’s yours. It was you who made it what it is today. Even if your just reading or posting and PM I salute you all. If anyone has any leads for me that I could follow to help this journey become shorter please PM me.
Take care!
Kash