BC,
As another former mil ATCO who is now on the civvy side of things, I am rather amazed by your assertion that you use 'the same rules'! During my military ATC career I could never fathom what rules, if any at all, my FC chums were using.
All joking aside, handing back my blue jumper was the best thing I ever did. I would strongly recommend having a go at applying for NATS training. You start again at the bottom but you need to as it is very different (personal experience confirmed that!). If they ever let you out of that hole into the daylight you should come and have a look!
Good luck with whatever you do.
Sad