Your story is far from crap Kash!
It is an inspiration to many people! I'm glad to see that there are still pilots around with that raw, undying passion for flying. And all this, despite the current situation!
I have a similar story but I think I had it easier than you. My parents funded my flying.I Started flying at the age of 14 after being given an intro flight for my birthday! Flew once or twice a month and ended up going solo on my 17th birthday. Did all the solo stuff and got my PPL a few months later.
Finished school in '06 and headed to 43 Air School in Port Alfred in Jan '07.
Did the CPL Ground School and got my night rating but was restless because I was far from home.
Ended up jacking it in and headed over to the UK for a while. Came back to SA and got a job in IT. Hated every second of it. Managed to build some reasonable solo time with my salary. But, the bug just didn't go away.
Eventually quit my job in Sep '08 and started studying for the CPL subjects. Returned to 43 Air School in Feb '09 (2nd time lucky?) and got to work on getting the subjects out of the way. Got my subjects in July and started with the advanced flying. Started on the multi-engine stuff (Seneca 1) on the 2nd of November and graduated with a CPL/ME IR a little over a month later on the 8th of December 2009.
Been unemployed since but starting my Instructors Course next monday, after which I have a solid guarantee of a job with the flying school I'm doing it at!
My only word of advice to anyone who is feeling disheartened? Believe! You can do it.