Rainboe - Read it as you wish. I do not really care about "the trauma" an F/O goes through to get the 4th stripe, as I am sure a small minority will detail it at great length on this very site.
I deal with Captains every day. Some top people, highly educated and very professional. Most are even a pleasure to sit and have a beer with. Leaders? Probably about 80%. I can make that judgement because I am not in the chain of command. Decision makers? Absolutely. That is the pressure that pays the bucks. But bad decisions will be judged.