Ref active wings. The MLA (manoevre Load Alleviation) is an option and my company has disabled it on our Airbus Fleet. As for the ailerons constantly moving because of the FBW, well they don't. It isn't a Tornado - the Airbus is quite stable and the whole Airbus FBW philosophy is to minimise control movements to prevent drag from moving aerodynamic surfaces. This is the theory behing the 'soft' limits and parameters which should actually make for a better tanking platform.
I've got about 3000 hours on the Airbus and as an ex-tanker 'person' I reckon it would make an excellent tanking platform.