Taking note of PdV's coaching achievements I reckon we might just hold the Wallabies but the Blackness may be too much to handle. No contradiction. Bluster and excuses don't win games and hopefully he'll learn that before it's too late.
Bag of spice contains too much aniseed. Non-starter.
Perhaps a couple of pork chops for lunch - salt, pepper, ginger, apricot jam and butter liberally spread on them, wrap in foil then let them stew gently over low heat to the side of the main attraction for an hour or three. Should fall off the bone if done right.