The magical figure of 15% could refer to the maximum allowed by HM Revenue and Customs (boo hiss) that you may contribute into a pension plan.
I was led to believe that the crab ointment was the same colour and consistency as the Light Blue Blanco Polish that the RAF used occasionally on their Webbing Equipment.
Funny old thing, Once I asked the assembled throng of crabs and WAFUs (fish-heads) Sirs, why don't you polish your Flying Boots? Answer in chorus - Because boot polish is flammable!
REMF = Rear Echelon MoFo = derogatory term for someone in a military unit who is deployed but never faces the enemy, also could be a member of a unit that doesn't deploy.
I also learnt from wikipedia that Pongo is the genus for Orang-Utans. Thats probably where it came from!