GunkyTom
To be fair, I would expect an ATCO, certainly a NATS ATCO, to know that pilots disconnect autopilot in anticipation of an RA and handfly the manoeuvre... it's part of the procedure... I can't remember exactly at what point they disconnect, but I do know that as part of NATS TRUCE training when they discuss TCAS, they should include the pilots actions. Certainly do at Swanwick.
Like you I was in the mil before joining and as a mil flyer (rotary) then an ATCO, I never knew about handflyng TCAS RA. But as a NATS ATCO I have had several presentations in the past 10 years and they all include the fact that the pilot handflies the RA.
Might just be that there is a bit missing from training as far as TCAS is concerned at MACC? Not having a go, just a very pertinent observation considering your remarks